Staycation-Say It Like It's a Good Thing

Today is the second day of a long Memorial Day weekend.  It's obvious to me that many folks have headed to the hills, or the woods-they certainly are not in town (or at least that's my perspective after driving to and from church this morning). It's officially the first day of summer, and folks are looking to relax, play, and hit the open road.

This weekend, I am doing none of that. I'll say upfront that frugality is not the only reason for my mini staycation over these three days. The advantage of not have to answer to a regular nine to five job means that trips and vacations can be scheduled when others are not on the road.

Still, I am a big believer in treating weekends as weekends and holidays as just that even though (or perhaps especially because) I'm "retired".  My weekend needs to be frugal because I have a gulf coast mini vacation planned for July and I recently had a large lump remove from a canine arm/leg pit.  Nevertheless, my weekend has been filled with fun and relaxation in equal parts. In other words, I've found plenty of ways to celebrate without spending money. I've also taken a day time nap or two, just on principle.

Everyone enjoys different pursuits, but I suspect most of us have access to lots of free fun. Many of us have to look harder, especially those in smaller towns, I suspect. Finding fun that's free is doable, even if you have to create some of that fun yourself. One thing's for sure, by creating your own fun (especially if it's close to home), you've not only saved money and time, you've eliminated that bumper to bumper traffic Monday night that brings reality back with a jolt.

This weekend, am (or have)

• Going to the movies. What can I say, it's May in Texas and already in the nineties. I make it frugal by going to the early show and forgoing the munchies. The Avengers was the perfect kind of mindless Memorial Day weekend movie (my last film was the Best Exotic Marigold Hotel)). I'll also confess here that my next film will not be frugal. You'll see me at midnight, paying full price, in a week or so when the film Prometheus opens-how could I miss an Alien Prequel.
• Viewing a local blues festival from the "outside". Our town is holding it's first annual blues festival with Robert Cray and Jimmie Vaughan as the headliners. While they have an indoor concert (not cheap), they also have a beer garden with local blues guitarists, a display from the Texas Musician's museum that includes guitars and Roy Orbison's clothing, and all kinds of other events (note that part of the reason I am not going to the concert is my inability to sit for hours without offending others in a standing room only concert venue. I save my concert going for places like Denver's Red Rocks these days).
• Attending an evening symphony put on by our local town philharmonic orchestra in a large city park. I will take my own wicker garden style chair, arrive an hour or so early, and perhaps even take picnic lunch.
• Taking advantage of the local pool party at my homeowners association pool.
• Grilling traditional picnic food including steak and ribs (gotten at loss leader prices of course) and fresh corn, and yes, smores (I'm a sucker for a melted marshmallow)
• Finally, I'm enjoying my patio in full. The pots are blooming, the cover provides shade, and my margarita glass and an uninterrupted book make it the perfect weekend respite.

What about you. How are you celebrating or remembering this Memorial Day weekend?

Summer Cooking, Frugally (sort of)

In Texas, we have now entered summer cooking season.  I don't know about you, but I tend to eat differently at different times of the year.  In Texas, it's summer, officially or not.  This can present challenges, in terms of cooking, eating, and keeping the food budget down.

 In theory, I could still use my oven and I do so about once a week. However, I'm really trying to keep my air conditioning bills down, and generally keep my home at around eighty. This is not uncomfortable to me, I dislike cold weather. It does mean that I am loath to heat up the house too often. I generally bake once a week, use my crock pot on rare occasions and otherwise stick to the grill and the stove top. My grill is my friend. I even bought an el cheapo gas grill at a yard sale. I've always been a charcoal girl, but I have to admit charcoal is a time factor issue for those occasions when I want to eat now. So, I'm willing to try gas and look at saving for a dual grill in the future.

On the one hand, it can be more frugal because I eat more simply in the summer, and I cook less often (and I live in an area where local fresh produce abounds for half the year).  I'm most likely to grill a whole pile of breasts (par cooking some), and putting them in the fridge or freezer. I them put them in salads, reheat with black beans and salsa-and I do the same with steak and other meats. I also alternate with simple soups and sandwiches, omelets with fruit and muffins (from my baking day) and even on occasion ready made ravioli from the deli section. Sometimes, the difference is not that huge.

Obviously, the financial downside of this kind of eating is that the kinds of meats and fish necessary for quick stove top cooking and grilling are generally more costly than the stew meats and pot roast and chili I throw in the slow cooker in January. Boneless chicken breasts, shrimp and lean meats are now a larger part of my one person budget. This means that I'm doing even more "extreme" couponing and buying in bulk as much as my small side by side freezer will take (I'm still looking for that small apartment sized freezer replacement). I'm hitting the farmers market every Saturday (not always exactly cheaper, but considering the quality, a much better deal). I've also explored Aldi, and on those rare occasions when I am near a store, Walmart or Target.

The end result is that so far, my food budget has been lower in the month of May. Whether this will continue to hold true during the summer, who knows. For know though, I'm piling on the grilled fish and meats and homemade salads and managing to do so frugally.

Oh, and let's not forget the occasional pint of salted caramel butter pecan ice cream from Safeway, which is to die for). I just need to remember that it and my quilting room are not a match made in heaven.

Another Store Bites The Dust!

The other day I was out running errands, and decided to stop at my local scrap booking store. I needed some pens and papers and they carry a large supply. I had not been there in a food month or so, because I had no upcoming events that I needed to make cards or gifts. When I got there, the store was dark and locked.  The store had gone out of business.

I am fortunate to live in an area where we have a fair amount of independent retailers. I do my best to support them, even on my limited budget. this occasionally means paying a bit more, but its something I feel is worth while, and supports the community that I live in. I budget accordingly. In my case this includes local fabric stores, an independent book store (both new and used), and independent hardware, and other similar shops. I get most of my gardening supplies and pots from an independent dealer rather than one of the big box guys. I'm not saying I buy everything this way, but they are my first go toes. I know the product will be good, as will the customer service. Psychologically I also know that it's small business that build the economy.

Unfortunately, my scrapbook store (which had very competitive prices and almost anything you could use), found that they could no longer compete with big box stores and the Internet and keep their prices at what they considered a fair level. I will miss them.

Meanwhile, In support of my own "small business", I attended an outdoor fair this weekend. This fair was part of a North Texas Etsy group and an experiment. We partnered with a vintage fair that has been in place for quite a while.Rather than a traditional fair, we were set up under the trees amidst the vintage dealers.  While I had an enjoyable weekend in the outdoors, we will definitely have to do some tweaking and further advertising before the fall holiday market. I did not "make" as much as the amount I spent on the fair entry. On the other hand, many people took brochures and asked about having quilts made for specific occasions, so it was a wonderful market experience.

Not to be outdone, I spent extra money (I know, I know). These two iron patio chairs were at a booth near me and I spent two days looking at them (what is it about turquoise and blue-almost everything sold at the vintage fair were these colors). I haven't decided if I will refurbish and resell or keep them for my self. I'm looking at yellow or green paint, and custom cushions in a retro print. I'll probably resell, just not sure where.

As if that wasn't a busy enough weekend, after Friday and Saturday I catered a reception and church, then came home to enjoy what was left of my day of rest. To make up for a rough three days, yesterday afternoon I sat down with my kindle and the newest John Sanford (Stolen Prey) and read the whole thing in a day.

Today it's back to being busier. I have quilts to finish, a patio to clean up (we are considering boarding dogs and doing dog daycare in the house), at least a bit of housework to face, and it's time to hit the pool!  I enjoy being busy but I so need my down time on occasion!!!

A Day Of Rest?

Before my husband passed away, we were in serious discussions about the option of retiring in Germany. We were happy there, and the cost of being paid on dollars and spending euros would have been offset enough by the difference in medical costs that we would have come ahead.

Whenever I talk to people who know this about me, they ask me what it is about the Germany lifestyle that kept us there. While there are many things I can point to, one come to mind on this beautiful Sunday. In Germany, Sunday is a quiet day. Period. Stores and shops are closed, with the exceptions of a few restaurants and those little stores affiliated with open gas stations. One is not allowed to make loud noises on Sunday-there is no lawn mowing,and no construction, large or small. Trucks are parked by the side of the road.  This is not a big brother issue-every few years some stores decide to test that waters and the citizenry overwhelmingly vote to keep things the way they are.

This is not necessarily about religion. Rather, it is about balance. Germans value working hard and playing hard (be clear that they do both just as much as we do, as well as having the equivalent stress). However, they have decided that in order to balance that business, a day of "rest" is a requirement. Somehow, even with two income families, kids sports teams, long working hours and all the other paraphernalia of life, they manage to do what they need to get done on those other six days.

All of this has come back to be during my period of technological fasting. I realized that in addition to my fast, there were other changes I wanted to make. Even in retirement, life needs balance. I spend my days (for the most part) doing as I choose.  Even when I "work" its at something enjoy. Still, I need time to myself, time that is disconnect if you will. To that end, I have made a few other changes. While I do occasionally labor on Sunday, it is on things that are enjoyable to me. In other words, I work in the garden but I don't vacuum. I stay disconnected except or approximately a half an hour in the evening when I check and see if my family members want to skype.  I do not answer phone numbers unless that are family, no matter what. In general,  use this time to downshift, relax and refresh.

What I do may not work for you, but I hope whatever you do, you find some time to be completely "down". You'll feel much better for it afterwards.

Single Retirement-Exploring Opportunities for Socialization

Single retirement can be extremely joyful.  There are also some unique challenges.  Sometimes challenges are financial (one retirement income instead of two).  Sometimes they are social.  While I certainly would not suggest that couples do not also face challenges meeting people, there are those occasions when they have an automatic partner (for eating out, going to the movies, going to a play).

If you are a single who has retired "in place" you probably have a more readily accessible group of friends, developed of the long term.  Those of us who relocate, or who haven't build up that wide circle face different challenges.  Widows and widowers are also often uniquely challenged if most of their friends were couples. I am not necessarily one of that latter group.  While my husband and I had joint friends, we had very different hobbies and as such had our own separate social circles as well. My husband belonged to a ski club and traveled without me at least once a month during the winter, as well as attending ski club socials. He was also active in the sports officiating community, and did things with that group of people on a regular basis. I had similar groups that were important to me. 

Unfortunately, part of living in the diplomatic/military community means that everyone moves somewhere else. This can be an advantage or a disadvantage. I retired to somewhere I had not lived before, in order to be near my husband's family for  my kids. As I've shared before, I was fortunate to find a church that was a perfect fit. As part of that church, I attend a monthly dinner group, participate in a woman's small group, and go to other social events (including a fish fry and silent auction coming soon).  Recently, I decided I needed something else.

I enjoy going out to dinner on occasion, I like the movies, and I like going to theaters and festivals.  While I am happy and comfortable doing those things alone, it's often more enjoyable with another person. I have absolutely no interest in a traditional singles group whatsoever-I just wanted to meet more people living closer to me with whom I could get together on occasion (my church is a half an hour away and members live all over the metroplex.  As such, I've decided to "step outside the box" if you will.

Awhile back, someone mentioned the option of the organization "Meet Up" to me.  At the time it was suggested to me as an alternative when I was looking for a book discussion group not church related. Other people have mentioned it to me as well. I think that another blogger, Tamara, may have some experience in this area. I did the research and found that Meetup has a wide variety of groups in my area. These included book clubs, a knitting group, and a local German speaking group that meets at our Bratskeller once a month. There is a group called Dining in Dallas, and one that goes to ethnic restaurants. Finally, there is a 50's plus social group.

This group meets once a month for breakfast, and also has a once a month social event. Art shows, movies, theaters, you name it. Yesterday I finally bundled up my courage and went to a program. The group went to a local theater to see The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, and then to a lovely Italian restaurant afterwards. Once I got over my discomfort of walking up and asking "is this the ..........group?", and introducing myself, I had a lovely time.  Everyone was friendly, the conversation was great, and the food was divine. I will surely be going to these outings regularly, and may even explore other opportunities to meet people.

Although I'm happy to go to restaurants and the like, I'm also happy to see that the members to casual less expensive things often-next month the event is a pool part and I while back the group went to an arts and the park even and also had a potluck supper and games night. My kind of group!

If I had not finally taken the plunge, I don't know what would have happened in the long run. It took me awhile, but I finally jumped, and am happier for it. What about you-have you stepped outside of your comfort zone lately?

Group Buying-You've Been Good To Me Lately

I'm here to say that overall I'm doing very well on my digital fast. It's now noon here in Texas. I've had breakfast, watered the plants and cleaned up the patio. I've straightened the house, read the newspaper and part of the new Stuart Woods novel. I've played with the dogs, straightened up the sewing room, and done plenty of other things. It's amazing how much one can get done this way!  There certainly have been some backslides, mainly because two of my college courses were online. School is finished however, and frankly, I'm finding this level of computer use to make life much more enjoyable. I'm especially enjoying my complete lack of Internet use one day a week. That day is completely committed to personal time and family time and nothing is allowed to interfere. (If we've agreed to try and Skype, on occasion I will leave the laptop on at certain times in the evening so that I can "answer a call" from family far away.

I do think for the foreseeable future (and perhaps longer) I've reached my comfort level of computer use. One of the things I have been doing is researching ways to both widen the readership of this blog a bit and advertise my little business.  After some consideration, I've decided not to join the twitter crowd. There has to be a limit, and this is mine.  What's more, I'm rarely using my personal Facebook page (although I do use my business page). Being off line, doing "real things" with "real" (as in face to face people) is something I consider valuable. This doesn't mean I will not be writing and posting here-on the contrary, now that school is finished I expect to post much more often. I just feel that I am in control of the time, and that my readers will understand if their comments appear after a couple hours instead of immediately. And the world will not end if I limit my online time to the afternoon, on the weekdays.

Now, having said all that, I still find the Internet extremely valuable in terms of both communication, enjoyment and especially saving money. I still go online daily, just not all day long. One of the things I do during my time online is to check for deals, steals, coupons, and group buying offers that may interest me. As those of you who do this type of thing know, this can be feast or famine in terms of results. Some days there may be absolutely nothing of use or interest. On occasion, I go days without seeing anything "worthwhile". On the other hand, if I did not spend this short time daily, I would never know what I had missed. I have found ways to cut down on the time spent, but going to sites that list coupons and deals rather than searching them out on my own.

When it comes to group buying sites, new ones are popping up daily. I could spend a significant amount of time looking for these offers. Instead, I go to a site that lists ALL of the various group buying options for my city.  Deal Radar is an invaluable resource for finding the good stuff in a short time.

Occasionally, at certain times of the year (or just when the moon is full) it seems that there are bunches of good deals being offered at the same time. It's times like these that make my group buying searches and finds worthwhile. Perhaps it's mother's day, but in the past week or so I have gotten three really good restaurant deals, forty dollars worth of quilting fabric for $20, a manicure and pedicure at a discount, and discount tickets to the Texas Rangers and a concert. It's times like these that make my extreme coupon searches online worth while.

As long as the computer continues to serve me and not the other way around!

Weddings For All?

Rarely do I comment on political issues. I generally keep my views (on things from universal health care on down) on low key. This blog is about my challenges and joys of  a frugal retirement. Its not a financial blog or a political blog. It's not a diary or a business.  Occasionally, I feel the need to share my thoughts and opinion on controversial subjects. This is one of those times. I believe on this issue people have an obligation to speak up. As the old saying goes, a vote to abstain is a vote against. In this case against what I consider basic human rights.

I am a devout Episcopalian. Recently when I was making some observations about about life in general, I mentioned how thankful I am for my church. I'm one of those people for whom finding a church is a major component of finding a place to live.  A friend once even said about relocation (and I agree) "find the church and then find the house". My faith is a large part of my life. I was married by a priest, in a church. I consider marriage to be both a religious and a secular institution. I consider marriage a lifetime commitment. I do not however, believe that my way of marriage is the only way, or that it should be the only way.

I have a beautiful 22 year old niece who is gay. She has always been gay. She didn't choose "gayness", nor did per parents 'make her that way". God, himself made her who she is.  If I believe that God makes us all, and makes us for a purpose (and I do) then I have to believe that she is who she was meant to be. It is my fervent hope, my prayer even, that by the time this beautiful young woman finds a partner, she is able to be married-both in front of God, and in front of the Justice of the peace.  When that time comes, I will attend her wedding, and with joy.

Her marriage, in front of God (by a priest) and in the church will in no way diminish me. It will not diminish my faith.  I will not make my family less than it is, or more than it is. Rather, her marriage will enrich my family. As a devout, religious young woman, entering into marriage would be a lifetime commitment and introduce  a new member to our family (and perhaps more new members).

This is a difficult discussion for me. In general, I respect the opinions of others. My problem in this case is that respect does not seem to be mutual. Others want to force their religion and beliefs onto me and my family.  They want to decide the kind of life, the quality of life, that she and we are allowed to have. I would suggest that should not be up to them. I would suggest that faith is an individual thing, that should be kept private and held close. I would suggest that one can live their faith in full without stopping others from living their lives, or participating in a different faith.

Finally, and I realize I may offend here,  I would suggest that I am continually amazed that individuals who consistently suggest that the government stay out of our lives seem to have an inordinate need to decide how we live, who we marry, and what we do with our own bodies.

And that's my thought for the day.